Comic Book Day 3/25/09

I missed last week because there were only two comics; I'll rectify and pellet-review them. Just for you!


Proof #18 -- I'm sad that nobody reads this comic. I'm glad Image has kept it going this far, at least. For those who don't know (so, Rick and Antony) this series is about a sasquatch named John Prufrock (nickname Proof) who works for a government agency that tracks down and preserves fantasy creatures. So, fairies, chupacabras, sewer alligators, etc. It sounds a little lame, maybe, but would a comparison to a wonderful mashup of Fables and The X-Files help? It's all tied together with neat, sketchy inks and solid, moody colors? You can brag to your friends you read Proof "before it was cool"?

Anyhow, this is a neat issue that really shows how much this series can expand. I really look forward to seeing what comes next in this book.

Battlefields: Dear Billy #3 -- This issue wrecked me, a little. After a few pages of Billy blabbing away, we get to the good stuff: Carrie's narration. As things start to get rocky, we see the real difference between her and Billy, and how their similarities and shared bonds ultimately doom their relationship. The last page is stunning, stirring and haunting all at once. I really don't know how the next Battlefields miniseries ("Tankies") can top this.

The trade of this short series comes out soon. Definitely keep an eye out for it.

Crossed #4 -- Garth Ennis has written about guys stuffing their own dicks up their ass after being told to fuck themselves, and Crossed is still the most messed up thing he's ever written. He spends this issue hammering home, as he has for the past few issues, that there's absolutely no Great White Hope in this world of zombies. They're not even zombies -- they're humans who, once infected, become the most evil and sadistic individuals the world has ever seen. They're smart (did a zombie ever think of spitting on someone to infect them?) and they've got a diabolical sense of humor (one word: horsecock). This miniseries is relentlessly nihlistic, and it's not even half over. Things can only get worse for the featured survivors, and I'll be there for every minute.


Guardians of the Galaxy #12 -- Okay, I think I'm getting the hang of what's going on. Drax (the dude who looks like a green-skinned version of Kratos from God of War) and Phyla (the daughter of Captain Mar-vell and inheritor of sweet Quasar power bands) were "killed" in effort to go to the realm of the dead to bring back Heather (the former's daughter and the latter's lover). It sounds a little convoluted, but it gets away with it with a fistful of dismemberments and one big black space dragon. I'm glad we're getting back to the rest of the gang so I can see some characters in the War of Kings event that I actually recognize.

Captain America #48 -- I'm only just now caught up with Brubaker's epic Cap run (cue: kicking self for waiting so long), just in time for Bucky's first big outing after donning the shield. It's a short and sweet bros-on-a-secret-mission with Namor and Black Widow for backup. Toss in a creepy, menacing villain and a mad scientist who's got a past with the Winter Soldier and you've got yourself a great chaser to a sprawling 40-some-odd issue saga. They're switching the numbering back to include all back issues in a few months (joining Daredevil's upcoming 500th issue, and matching Thor's recent 600 benchmark), but I hope Bru sticks around for a while. What else is he doing? Incognito? That comes out like what, every two months?


Nova #22 + 23 -- After catching up with the last two issues, I'm having a hard time deciding which Abnett/Lanning book I like better -- this or Guardians of the Galaxy. They're pretty different books (Guardians an ensemble series, Nova centering on The Richard Rider Show), but they share that same zippy DnA flavor. I guess I should just be glad I have both. I mean, check out the slick one-issue crossover with Nova 23 and Guardians 12; Quasar flies off at the beginning of Nova, makes his appearance in Guardians and still makes it back in time for the end of that same issue of Nova! That's what you get when one section of continuity and crossovers (in this case, Marvel's cosmic space) is handled by two dudes.

Jack of Fables #32 -- This issue suffers from the same rushed feeling that the last issue of Fables did, thanks to the impending Great Fables Crossover starting next month. Unlike Fables, though, Jack actually has some important, game-changing stuff to deal with in the latter half of the issue. It's a revelation that sort of blows away the reader and those affected in the story, but those explaining it (both the authors and the characters in the issue) seem to pass it off non-chalantly, like breaking up with a girl in a postscript. Anyway, glad to have everything sorted out for the crossover, which I expect big things of, Mr. Willingham. Don't disappoint, or else I'll... keep buying Fables. Bastard.


Air #7 -- This is one of the more compelling ongoing series around. Blythe's existential journey takes an even trippier turn this issue when she figures out she can travel not only through time and space, but through people, as well. I'm loving MK Perker's art, too -- detailed facial expressions, subtle body language and some of the most convincing kissing I've seen in a comic. This issue's on sale for a special price: one American dollar. You don't really have an excuse if you see this comic on the stands. Better yet, try out the first trade for a tenner. There should be all sorts of impressive quotes from comic creators on the back.

Deadpool: Games of Death -- Blargh. After Daniel Way's great run on the title character, this one-shot really disappoints. It's front-loaded with tons of exposition, while at the same time weighed down by uninspired cartoony violence and flat jokes in the last half. Mike Benson's got another shot with a Deadpool miniseries in a little while, so we'll see if some breathing room helps smooth things out a bit. Otherwise, I might have to drop Deadpool proper if this guy takes over after Way's run is through.

Recent Games 3/15/09

This'll be an occasional thing; I haven't been playing too many games lately (well, much less than usual), but a few have sucked me in . We've got a couple hardcore Capcom games and some stuff that's... yeah.



Street Fighter IV (PS3)-- I got pretty into Street Fighter II when they released the HD Remix edition for Xbox Live a while back, so I felt right at home with IV. It's... pretty much like Street Fighter II, but with shiny graphics, a few new characters and online play. The latter works a lot better than expected, except for the cheap sons of bitches online -- I guess I can't blame the developers for that, though. I guess. It's a very familiar game, and there are definitely some balance issues (pick Sagat and you win), but it's still an incredibly solid and engaging fighting game.



Peggle (Xbox Live Arcade) -- It's hard to explain the appeal of this game; you've just got to play it. There's a demo right here for your PC. It's very simple. Either you don't get it, or you spend hours bouncing a little ball down rows of pegs in order to clear all the orange dots on the screen. I've had good experiences with the multiplayer, though when I say good I mean the pure luck involved in this game sometimes fills me with an unspeakable rage that would frighten my mother.



Resident Evil 5 (Xbox 360) -- The demo for this game really turned me off. After loving Resident Evil 4, I was disappointed to find that the game hadn't really evolved at all. There was the same tank-like controls that, in the four years since RE4's release, have been improved upon greatly by games like Gears of War and Dead Space. Resident Evil 5, in the year 2009, does not allow you to move and shoot at the same time. At first I thought this was a real gamebreaker for me--the demo shot the game down from an instant purchase to a definite rental for me.

I sat down to play the game this weekend, and was really surprised with the results. The controls don't matter too much after about half an hour, and the same unique visceral feeling that permeated RE4 starts to shine through. Besides the incredibly polished and detailed graphics, the only real new wrinkle is a co-op mode, which really does add a lot to the game. It makes proceedings a bit less frightening (though the fear of getting your head cut off by a chainsaw-wielding maniac is still there), but the action remains as tense as ever. The teamwork dynamic is very well suited to this game.

The series director has said that the next game in the main franchise will be another big reboot/retooling like RE4 was. I believe it. This game is like a huge tribute to (or a museum for) old school game design, for Japanese development especially. There are the bosses and enemies with big bright and obvious weak points, bosses that you have to lure into traps of fire, buttons to push and levers to pull. Hell, there's even a level full of conveyor belts that just keeps feeding flammable containers into a furnace -- a veritable exploding barrel factory. That and the tons of unlockables and fun arcadey Mercenaries mode really scratch the right spots for a longtime "hardcore" gamer like me.



Noby Noby Boy (Playstation Network) -- Can you call something a game if there's really no objective, or um, point to it? Sure, stretching your snake-like body around simple, clean storybook levels is fun, but why? Yeah, I giggle every time I eat something and a big bump slithers down my body until I poop out the object (or person) unharmed, but does that really justify an official software release? For five dollars, I felt like I had my money's worth in fun and dicking around doing nothing. And isn't that really what games are for, anyway?

Comic Book Day 3/11/09

Huge week, for me. I'll try to keep these shorter than last week. But no promises! Promises are for politicians and girlfriends.

Green Lantern Corps #34 -- The delays for the regular Green Lantern series have finally started affecting the Corps, as the Red Lantern that Kilowog brings in seems to have been apprehended in some mystical future issue. That's some Lost shit right there. An uneven issue, if only for the talky first third and the hardcore balls-to-the-wall brawl that follows it. Uneven isn't the right word, because that implies "bad". But it's too late now! The delete key is for college kids and the morning after drunk-texting.

Young Liars #13 -- This continues to be the most batshit insane series around. This issue follows last month's crazy ambiguous installment (which followed a similarly world-upside-down-turner issue itself) , and follows Johnny/Danny six months after he leaves a mental hospital. Danny is trying to piece things together at the same time the reader is, which I think might also qualify as "Lost shit, right there". It's hard to explain this series to anyone beyond "ludicrous" and "brilliant".

Ghost Rider #33 -- For the start of an arc, this issue doesn't really "go" anywhere or set much of anything up (beyond "let's take down Zadkiel"), but it sure is awesome. We get to see what the new Caretaker has seen -- Ghost Riders throughout history. Tony Moore seriously knocks it out of the park -- a Tommy gun-wielding Ghost Rider in the prohibition era, pilgrim Ghost Riders chasing down witchhunters, an ace dogfighter Ghost Flyer in WWI, a group of Ghost Tankies in WWII, Ghost Riders from what seems like a Mad Maxian future. If crazy crap like that sounds sweet to you, you need to read this series. If not, you are officially not coming to my birthday party.

Guardians of the Galaxy #11 -- I should thank Marvel for these first-page recaps, because I totally forgot that Drax and Phyla were killed somehow. Well, not killed, really, as much as in some sort of purgatory, or something? It doesn't matter, because there are huge black dragons, Captain Marvel zombies and Drax being the badass Space Kratos that he is.

Fables #82 -- (spoilers herein) I wouldn't say this issue is as much as an "epilogue issue" that it claims to be; it's really more what you'd call "filler before the huge crossover next month". Basically, it's hammered home that yes, Boy Blue is really dead. And we finally end that little miniseries that's been eating a few pages of the the last five issues. Maybe it'll read better if they paste it all together in a trade, but I could never bring myself to do more than skim it, at best.

Action Comics #875 -- And the Kryptonian Nightwing and Flamebird are... umm, people I've never really heard of? The girl is the daughter of a couple of Zod's original crew, and the guy's name is Chris, I guess? I should really check a forum to see what the hell is going on. Anyway, I'm gonna stick around to see how Rucka handles this scavenger hunt for the evil Kryptonian agents that Zod's left around earth. Side note: I dig the "power suits".

Battle for the Cowl #1 -- It's a bit sad that I don't exactly want to read this series as much as I just want to know what happens so I can be filled in when the new series start up in June. I'm probably just going to stick with Detective and Batman, pick up Morrison and Quitely's Batman and Robin and mayybe Dini's Gotham City Sirens. Tony Daniel's doing alright; I often enjoy reading works by a writer/artist, even if they can be a bit self-indulgent sometimes.

DMZ #40 -- Brian Wood has said that this arc points to the end of the series, wrapping up around issue 60 or so. The escalation between the two (now three... four?) groups has come gradually and naturally, but it feels like things are really accelerating now. This issue is definitely a lot quieter than you'd expect after the big reveal last month, but the calm deliberation is sort of a nice surprise. I predict that the next year and a half or so will be spent growing Matty into something other than the little brat he is currently. Next month I guess we'll see what's up with Zee, and if she killed herself or whatnot? I was confused by the offhanded comments and dreams in the last couple issues.

Scalped #26 -- Not as good as the last issue, but that was probably my favorite single issue of my favorite series currently running. So, Jason Aaron, I officially forgive you. It still was a strong read, trying its hardest to wring out some sympathy for the murdering bastard Diesel. It worked, dammit. But only a little! I usually reserve those kinds of feelings for crying girls and dogs at the Humane Society.

What if this woman used to be a man?

A friend and I were just having an argument that didn't exactly end well. She was complaining about Megan Fox, how she's ugly and has fake boobs (and gets more attention than her, etc). She compared Miss Fox to a tranny, but was quick to put on her best Seinfeld voice to assure me that there "wasn't anything wrong with that".

In fact, it would give her cause to, in fact, like Megan Fox. My friend believes that if the already-popular star were to all of a sudden "come out" as a transsexual, the country could elevate her fame to new heights, and cause many people to question their own sexuality. She'd become the first cross-gender symbol, ushering in a new age where people had frank and honest conversations about this sort of thing.

Personally, I think it's too far off. Sure, this is from the guy whose hometown elected the country's first "transgender" mayor, but most of the population just isn't ready. This is the nation that voted for Prop 8. Sure, Hollywood, New York and San Francisco could take it, but too many bros (Fox's main audience) would be scared away from the idea fantasizing about someone who is even close to being a fellow bro.

Infuriated by my cynicsm, my friend slammed her instant messaging box shut as hard as she could. I guess she'll just have to go back to a world where gay people have come as far as black people. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

So... how 'bout that David After Dentist?

If you don't know what I'm talking about, just watch it first.

Kind of funny, right? Well, you are just a bad person. This is a little kid on drugs. We're seeing him in that state in the only socially acceptable context, but that does not mean it is right. This is one of the most popular YouTube videos in recent memory, at 14 million views after just a month (I swear it was at 13 mil just a few days ago), sooo apparently the general internet populace are a bunch of morally bankrupt bastards. In the video, David asks "Why is this happening to me?". Why indeed, America. Why indeed.


So, upon starting this post, I had an option between false self-righteous indignation or a faux-analysis of David After Dentist's deep-rooted philosophy (What is forever, David?). I don't know that I made the right choice.

Comic Book Day 3/4/09

I hope to make this a sort of weekly thing, to keep in the practice of writing. My mind is constantly stewing while I read this stuff, so why not pour out some hearty brain broth to share with everyone? I might even find a few new spices along the way.

Liking that stew/brain analogy? Yes. Yes, I thought so. Well, the pot is full, my friends, so expect some sweet, sweet leftovers in the days to come. Mmm... it's even better the day after!

So! This post contains capsule reviews of comics that came out this week. If you don't read comics, feel safe skipping this. It may run a bit long, but until someone tells me how to page break on this damned website, I am sort of screwed. Well, you are.

War of Kings #1 -- I have been following Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning's (or DnA to nerds like me) stellar Nova and Guardians of the Galaxy series, so I figure this cosmic-event miniseries might strike my fancy. It's off to a fun start so far, though I'm a bit hung up on the whole "what the hell is going on what who is that should I care that he died" sensation I felt throughout the book. There's a huge barrier to entry on this thing; fittingly enough, there is a giant interstellar barrier featured in the first few pages. I suppose it goes to show that the barrier is taken down within the course of the issue, and things a'splode shortly thereafter. Really, any bewilderment is smashed each time I turn the page to see grossly detailed alien cities being torn apart by gigantic space weightlifters shooting lasers and punching each other in the throat. Props to frequent DnA partner Paul Pelletier and the rest of the art crew. I only expect it to get even better as the series goes on. No pressure, guys.

Batman: Cacophony #3 -- This is a strong end to a decent miniseries. The first two issues are fun, if in large part a retread on past Joker stories. There wasn't a whole lot to make it stand out next to Ledger's and Azzarello's recent takes, leaving author-created baddie Onomatopoeia to give the series some verve. It actually hits its stride when that crazy bastard takes off, leaving Batman and Joker to have a real heart-to-heart. The conversation is revealing and hilarious, and puts quite a different spin on two archenemies than we see in The Dark Knight. It's that scene that really "makes" the miniseries. I liked this quite a bit more than the only other Kevin Smith comic I've read (his short run on Daredevil), and it makes me wonder if I shouldn't seek out a bit more. Any man who can sneak in such a timely Christian Bale reference deserves at least that much.

Deadpool #8 -- I swear, each time I pick up this comic I think I'm going to tire of the relentlessly self-referential and pop-culture obsessed humor, but each new issue has made me laugh since the series started. I almost groaned when Deadpool announces to himself (himselves, I should say) that another bout of hallucination was heading our way, but I'll be damned if it wasn't aggravatingly funny. Is this series really gonna make me pick up Thunderbolts for the story tie-in? I am dangerously close to being obliged to do so.

Battlefields: Dear Billy #2 -- Admittedly, I'm a bit taken off-guard at how good this series is. This particular part of the Battlefields anthology (Dear Billy) has proven even more compelling than the previous installment (Night Witches). The latter has the benefit of a more engaging premise (Russian women in WWII become the terror of night skies in jalopy biplanes), but the former (the love affair of a soldier and a nurse with traumatic pasts) has a much stronger voice, thanks to its coldly hearfelt narration. As much as it surprises me to say, I think I liked this more than the other Garth Ennis book released this week.

The Boys #29 -- As much as I love this series, it does get bogged down a bit too often with corporate politics. Part of me thinks it heresy to befoul the name of Ennis' next big creator-owned series after Preacher, but scenes with two suits talking on cell phones just flat-out bore me, even if one of them is a loon who wants a recently deceased superhero resurrected into a mindless zombie. Thankfully, Hughie gets himself in trouble before the book's end, and the rest of The Boys declare that it is in fact business time. Lines like "He's savin' strippers" are why I read Ennis books. That and he finds great guys to draw hilarious gut-spattering violence. Darick Robertson's fill-in guy for this issue does a good job of keeping tone with the series, but it's a bit distracting when he doesn't get the faces quite right (see: Frenchie and The Female's big page just before the shit hits the fan). Looking forward to the conclusion of this arc -- seems like Mother's Milk's side story is finally paying off.

Told you it'd be long. Just imagine next week, where I get something insane like eleven or twelve comics.

Press Start

I sort of meant to create this blog about a year ago, but never really did that. Rick reminded me. So here I am! If you chuckled the first time you read the title of this blog, perhaps we can be friends. If you don't have any idea what it means, then, we will just have to see about you.